Inspired by The Knot
During the process of your wedding planning, you’ll find you probably have a lot on your plate, with all those venue tours, cake tastings, menu options and colour scheme choices. Once these tasks are added on top of your everyday work and responsibilities, it’s easy to let small details fall through the cracks. For example, forgetting to ask about unclear plans or waking up randomly in the middle of the night wondering if you’re missing something. With the help of your wedding party or planner, you can definitely handle any potential curveball that might be thrown at you during your special day, so don’t stress! However, if you want to be a go-getter and start thinking ahead, here are a few wedding questions couples often forget to ask before it’s too late.
1. Who is responsible for lifting the bride’s veil?
Though there are many variations of bridal veils, for a traditional veil that’s draped over the bride’s face, there are two options. The first is to have the father of the bride lift the veil when he gives her away, revealing her to her partner. The second is for the bride to keep her veil over her face during the ceremony, then have their partner lift it just before the first kiss.
2. Is there a specific side we are supposed to stand on during the ceremony?
Traditionally, a Christian ceremony in church entails the bride to stand on the left and the groom on the right. Guests of the bride and groom sit accordingly, on the side of whomever they know best or are related to.
For Jewish ceremonies, it’s the opposite – bride on the right, groom on the left. Many couples also prefer free seating, telling their guests to place themselves wherever they please.
If neither of you have a partiality towards any religion or particular tradition, stand however works best for your ceremony.
(Hint: Tell mutual friends to sit on whichever side that has the least people.)
3. What exactly does the couple do during the cake cutting?
The cake cutting usually takes place after dinner has been served and eaten, but you can also cut a quick slice right as you enter the reception or after the toasts and speeches wrap up. Get everyone’s attention by asking your DJ or maid of honour to make an announcement, if this doesn’t suit, one of you can do this.
If you have elderly guests or families with small children who might be leaving early, it’s best to cut your cake near the beginning of your reception or right after dinner.
Traditionally, you hold your cake cutting tool of choice together and cut into the bottom layer of the cake. However, with a three-tiered cake, many people cut from the middle tier down, but you can cut it however you like. If needed, your cake baker or caterer can give you a brief tutorial beforehand. You don’t need a perfect slice, just enough to give each other a bite. (…or smash into each other’s faces – if that’s your tradition😉)
4. How should the wedding party travel to the reception?
You and your partner might have the perfect ceremony exit planned, but don’t forget you’re also responsible for getting your wedding party to the reception. If you’re going casual and want them to simply drive over, let everyone know this beforehand so they can carpool or organise transportation ahead of time. Some couples like to travel with their bridal party and arrive at the same time.
5. Where should you put your engagement ring during the ceremony?
Wear your engagement ring on your right hand or have your maid of honour keep it safe for you. If you want to wear your engagement ring for the reception, you can put it on after the ceremony.
For Jewish weddings, it’s okay to wear your engagement ring and then exchange wedding bands if you want to keep with tradition. Also remember: The wedding band is usually worn on your left hand, on the second last finger, however you can choose to wear your ring on whichever hand or finger you like.
6. Does the bride really need someone to hold the dress in the bathroom?
You’ve likely seen this traditional deed done in romantic comedies, but whether or not you get this sort of royal treatment depends on the dress. A full-length ball gown will probably require an extra set of hands to hold up the skirt while you do your thing. the cost of not having those extra hands versus the benefit of having them is really a no-brainer.
7. Is there a right way to perform the first kiss?
We probably don’t need to tell you to keep it PG, but please do. Your first kiss as a married couple however, definitely doesn’t have to be just a peck. Do what comes naturally to you both as long as you don’t catch your partner by surprise or do anything you’ll regret in a few years when you’re rewatching your wedding videos.
8. Should the bride take her veil off after the ceremony?
This isn’t really the first decision to make while wedding planning, but if you choose to wear a veil you will end up wondering at some point during your special day. It’s perfectly okay to wear the veil for the entire reception (if you’ve got it, flaunt, right?), but if you want to go veil free for the party, there are a few favourable times to take it off. The first is right after the ceremony (while getting your hair done have your hairstylist show a bridesmaid how remove it without messing up your ‘do); another is after the ceremony photoshoot before the reception; and the third is after the first dance while your guests go back to their tables. Once it’s off, place it in a safe spot or hand it to your maid of honour. Additionally, if you’re not worried about accidentally spilling on it, drape it decoratively over your reception chair!
9. What’s the best way to greet guests—besides a queue line?
Without missing out on the mouthwatering food, greet your guests during the reception by stopping by each table during the first course. If you would prefer not to do this you could make a short speech thanking guests for coming and give a shoutout to vendors and parents (or anyone else who helped plan and pay for the celebration). While this moment with the mic shouldn’t replace personal interaction with your guests, it can be a great way to let everyone know how grateful you are.
10. Can you take your shoes off during the reception?
We’ve all been to weddings where guests cut loose on the dance floor and ditch the uncomfortable footwear for bear feet or flats. However, the thought of stepping on something sharp or getting stepped on by some woman’s stiletto and risking an injury during the fun can deter us from going barefoot. Instead, bring a pair of flats or snazzy sneakers for dancing. If you’re getting married in the summer, whether it’s a beach or a garden wedding, place baskets of flip-flops near the dance area so your guests can slip into them before they hit the dance floor!